God’s power vs willpower

I don’t know what is wrong with me but I am spiraling out of control.

will-power

Burgers and fries on Thursday, egg rolls and teriyaki wings on Friday, candy canes, sugar cover almonds, slices of cheese, sugar laden lemonades, nuts covered in rancid oils. Ugh.  It’s like I’ve lost the plot. And I can tell it’s effected me so much more than just my IBS.  I am moody, and anxious.  I want to cry at any given moment, I’m back to fighting with my husband constantly.  I’m yelling at my daughter.  I just have no patience.  And yet I continue to eat.

I know what I need to do, I need to turn to Christ. I need his grace and his love to get me back on track.  I need to remember everything IS permissible.  It just may not be beneficial. My chiropractor, God bless him, I think has been partly the cause of some of this.  His words to me of stopping all sugars, even fruit.  Of just being better and not eating out AT ALL has caused me to resort to my old ways of rebellion.

Before that I had gotten into a good rhythm with God.  I knew I could have taco bell and chocolate cake whenever I wanted. That wasn’t the problem.  The problem was I wanted it more than I wanted my relationship with God and so I knew who I needed to turn to.  My chiro has be thinking I need to turn inward and into myself again and just have the willpower to stop.  Well I will tell you this, there is no such things as will power. Only God’s power and I need to be in search of that again.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s